Panic Attack

I scream at myself alone in my car,

I do it to breathe.

I scream

In pain

I scream

In fear

I scream because I need to breathe

I scream alone inside my car at a red light so no one can hear it.

Because it is only screams

I'm ok

I don't feel pain anymore

My body healed "beautifully"... the doctor said

How come I still see myself lying in the street?

Some dude who knows his shit says I have PTSD,

So does the internet.

I refuse to believe either

I had to ask the nurse to level the gurney with the XRay table

And I crawled

I don't think I have ever heard my own screams like that.

I was supposed to be Wonder Woman,

The only thing I used to fear were chickens.

I'm supposed to make a list:

I fear chickens.

I fear chickens and breathing.